What to do when you are in anger?
Tips for doing what sounds so easy but is so hard
• Recognize whether your anger is out of control, organized, or focused.
• Remember others may not know how to deal with their own anger let alone yours.
• Trust that you were a reasonable human before you were attacked and therefore you will get control of this energy and be constructive.
• Decide and make a promise to yourself and then don’t break it.
• Be accepting and loving with whatever your decision is because you can always choose again if one is too difficult or does not work out as you intended.
• If all else fails, become a fitness junkie and channel that energy into physical fitness.
• Yep, this is the point where I am going to plug nature again like it was a corporate sponsored brand she was getting endorsements to promote. Nature has organized energy that is neutral and non-judgmental. Chances are that oak tree is not going to say the wrong thing and spin your heightened energy into orbit like an ignorant but well-meaning therapist or friend might.
• You will absorb the organized and neutral energy of nature by immersing yourself in it. Jesus, Buddha, and I all subscribed to this wisdom and found peace. You will also, if you choose to.
Steps for getting anger energy from out of control to focused and productive.
Out of control energy is the kind that causes havoc. Boundaries can be breached and sometimes collateral damage can occur. This can also be a cause for later guilt which adds pressure, forcing you back down the energetic ladder. Use the following steps to continue moving higher on the vibrational scale versus down back into the hole.
1. Breathe and count to 60 before reacting in any way.
2. Get away from everyone into nature if possible. If not then excuse yourself and go to the bathroom, most people will not follow you or question this. The bathroom is usually safer.
3. Once in the bathroom, let the chaos of your anger fly around in shape shooting spurts. Just watch it like a fourth of July fireworks show in your head.
4. Pick an object preferably a solid inanimate object and determine the materials it is made of and its organized material structure that allows it to function. Think about the molecules lining up and ordering to create the solid mass.
5. Think again about the pieces to the culmination of your anger and start to list and sort those feelings, situations, histories, and events in your mind.
6. At this point, it is beneficial to think of solutions if possible. Identify what need is not being met. Also, consider the current situation and any problems that have led up to the anger point and are contributing to the energy rush.
7. Meditating on the organized structure, mesh the organization with the disorganized and chaotic anger thoughts and bring them into alignment.
8. Once you have a goal and the anger energy is focused you should proceed forward quickly using the momentum of the anger energy to accomplish the tasks in between you and the completion of your goal.
Because anger is energy that was taken on based on your individual intake of power, it is not possible for it to control you. Only if you decide to be destructive will anger be destructive. This is a major myth that I’ve psyched myself out with before. I believed the anger was more powerful than I was and blamed my outbursts and incorrect actions on that. This is kind of like when a guy tries to guilt you into sex by complaining of blue balls. It just isn’t so and is a convenient excuse for poor judgement and choosing negative paths that will inevitably have negative outcomes.
The best-case scenario, and what one can expect to accomplish with the miracle of anger energy, is to love yourself for creating energy and letting you know your needs are unfulfilled. Then determining those needs and taking the energy generated and using it to get the unfulfilled needs met. This is the secret to anger and why we have it and what it can do for us. This is also why others may dissuade us from being angry, they are trying to make you accept that you deserve or the only option is unfulfilled needs or they are intimidated by the power you create. Be thoughtful though, because they could just be afraid your anger is uncontrolled and will affect them negatively.
Interesting side notes and personal study on management by sarcasm and hostile work environments
Many work environments I’ve encountered are hostile in one manner or another. An interesting tactic that I’ve seen employed over and over is the hostile work environment scenario. Managers say one thing and practice another even if it is clearly against state or federal law. Know it is not that you are “too sensitive”. You are now just aware of what energy is leading your environment.
Part of shepherding your energetics is acknowledging the true way someone’s comments and actions affect your energy level. A good policy is to let the person know privately that the behavior is causing a problem for you. Based upon their response you will understand the course of action you will need to take. Make a list of the pros and cons of the job and start making plans for a long-term solution to this. If the manager is receptive and apologetic then count yourself extremely lucky and forgive and adjust. You have a great manager and an uncommonly positive and progressive work place.
On the other hand, you may get a variety of different answers that boil down to “deal with it or work elsewhere.” I generally choose to work elsewhere. First acknowledge and accept they have a right to be this way and you have a right to be somewhere else. Begin looking for alternative work and with your greater awareness be sure to ask some questions about management style. Take good care of yourself while you have to be in the hostile work environment. Make no mistake that it is hostile. If you feel the need or think you can change the environment it may be worth it to take it up the chain of command.
Keep in mind that the bottom generally reflects the top and things in this dimension and on this plane, are not generally as they appear. Make sure it is worth it before you embark on the battle and know that you will meet resistance. They are not likely to see things as you do and will likely use guilt, shame, and blame to put you in your place. It is not advisable to take on this battle if you are trying to crawl out of the tunnel. Save this for when you have more strength and energy for a battle.
At the end of the tunnel you will find courage. The only way to know you’ve hit courage is to not let them win. When they don’t change you, this is courage. Courage is when you are afraid at the crossroads of penalization and you do it anyway because living in fear is not living at all. This is how you make it pass the 200-energy level and start living and do not recycle back down into guilt, shame, fear and depression. Once you get to courage it is much easier to move up in energy level.
You may encounter resistance from those that are closest to you. The thought, “Damn if I was watching them and the roles were reversed, I would help them out. Do not be taken by surprise on this. Go ahead and be angry about it now and use that fuel for the climb. Inadvertently, they are doing you a favor. Be very proud of yourself as you have come to the crucial tipping point and made an informed decision.